Lets call him R. I met him the same way I did D, through schooling.
A classmate and I always giggled at him. He’s very socially awkward, moreso than most men are. He doesn’t quite know when to stop talking about things that people visibly don’t care about. For instance, the reason the samurais would win in a battle versus a ninja. (I said ninja…guess what he said?)…This discussion went on for the whole 3 hours we were sitting in class. Eventhrough a movie and then during the break, when I was attempting to go to the restroom, but didn’t want to just walk away in the middle of a conversation…because I’m “nice.”
Another issue with him is that we thought that because of his looks, he was starved for attention…Don’t get me wrong..he’s not bad looking at all…actually quite attractive, its his personality that makes him undesirable. Anyways, one day my classmate and I sit down and are waiting for class to begin when he comes up and sits next to me. He’s flirting and I’m not exactly turning his efforts down. Then he brazenly makes a move. I was actually dreading this part.
“so uh, give me your number and I can take you out tonight.”
Essentially I said “no”, but lets just put this conversation on hold and break down the reasons WHY I rejected his intense little heart.
1) Don’t tell me to do anything. especially if it involves me giving you personal information.
2) What makes you think I’m free tonight? Do you honestly think I’m so desperate for a date that would drop all my previous engagements to go out with you?
3) atleast he could have said something clever like, “What has 142 teeth and holds back the incredible hulk? My zipper…” jeesh!
So back to the story. When I told him , “ahhh no thanks.” he said, “oh thats fine anyways, whatever.” and got up…then sat next to my classmate and did the same…When she told him she was dating someone his response was:
“So?! What boyfriend don’t know won’t hurt him…”
Fastforward three months. I’m coming down with the flu and am congested as a motherfucker. After class one day he corners me and uses a group project to get my number….stupid, sick me thought, “meh, innocent enough I guess.” WRONG.
For the next two weeks all I recieve are random text messages from R. Eventually they begin to get later and later in the evening until 6 months later he’s calling at 3 am and texting me even later. So one day, out at the bar I decide to engage him. This would prove to be a BIG mistake on my part.
For the next three days he keeps incessantly texting me asking me where I want to put his…well…his “incredible hulk.” Then when I’ve had enough I tell him (via text message):
“O.M.G. YOU MUST THINK MY VAGINA IS THE SIZE OF A BLACK HOLE BIG ENOUGH TO SWALLOW THE SUN!”….THAT got him to ease up and back off….
up until a couple days ago. when he started messaging me via myspace. WTF. MYSPACE?! REALLY? can’t we atleast pretend we are adults and conversate thru Facebook, Twitter or Skype?!
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